Disclaimer:
Wherever the word 'Sex' is mentioned, it indicates its verb form, and not the noun.
It
all began as a casual talk with my father. Myself being 24 years old, talks drifted
between career, getting settled and marriage. At a point of time, I was totally taken aback when my
father said, I should get married to have kids who will be future citizens, and the
fabrics of society.
The first question that popped up in my mind
is 'Why can't I have kids without marriage?'. And it led to another question,
'Is marriage a license to have sex and kids??? '. And when I began to think in
these lines, I remembered number of instances in movies of regional language,
where the dialog pops up, 'Those things (Obviously sex) can wait till marriage'. The feeling to have a physical relationship (I
meant sex!!! It 's not a vulgar word), is as much as a feeling of anger,
happiness, pain, and any range of natural emotion. It is a natural feeling, as
much as any other feeling.
Sex
is also a form of expression, a physical version of love. Which is why the art of having sex is also
called as 'Love making'. So if 'Freedom
of expression' is a fundamental right of every citizen, so is the freedom to
have sex, irrespective of the marital status.
I have personally seen many boys and girls,
whose dignity has been ripped off, just because they had sex. They had been
accused and handled worst than a murderer or cheat. And pre-marital sex is the
biggest taboo in our society still. I mean what difference is the marriage
gonna make? Are they gonna have longer time of fun, when compared to premarital sex? Or are the children born out of marriage is gonna have higher IQ?
To
call a child which is not born out of
marriage, as a 'illegal child' is
downright stupidity. In the times of dynasties, the children which are not born
out of marriage will pose a threat to the throne. That is the reason why they
were called illegal. Following the same logic in modern times of our democracy
is mere stupidity.
And
taking on 'arranged marriage Vs Love marriage'. I like to keep it simple,
''Marriage
should be born out of love, and Love is not a product of marriage. In that case
its 'conditional love'. It's like. ' I love him/her just because am married to
him/her, I won't give a damn otherwise' ''
P.S:
Am a virgin.
I felt guilty when I first felt the need for physical intimacy. And in our super conservative culture it was once wrong for even a married woman to talk to another person forget about touching him even non-sexually. I find it still puzzling , how marriage magically prevents a man/woman from falling for other.(Especially in those cases where they are emotionally/physically not satisfied).
ReplyDeleteBut right now , I see this stuff being challenged by people like you and mine. We may or may not get our answers right now but will see to it.I see marriage as a way to bond the man and woman together to raise kids,if we find an alternative ensuring children welfare, I am sure this thing called marriage will bite the dusk within our lifetime.
And a world without marriage - where mates can be exchanged or lured. How would you handle that?
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